Where Are We?

Where are we in the adoption process?  What happens now?  Is she officially ours?

All questions I have been asked since our daughter came home to us in June.

Currently, we are in the post placement process.  In Oklahoma we must complete three post placement visits with our social worker.  Meaning, our social worker from the agency will come to our home and visit us once in July, August and September.

During these visits we will be asked how our family has adjusted to being a family of five.  Are we bonding with the baby?  Has our extended family met her and have they accepted her into the family?  Have we had any major changes in our lives since her placement?  How has she changed?  What does she like? Dislike?

Each visit lasts approximately an hour and is very causal.  By no means are those all the questions we will be asked, and we may not be asked any of the above.  The questions above are meant to be examples.  Examples of what you as an adoptive parent can expect.

After completing our post placement visits the social worker will draft a report which is added to the home study.  These documents are filed with the court during the finalization hearing which takes place 6 months after placement in Oklahoma.  The finalization waiting period can vary from state to state just like the post placement requirements vary from state to state.

So right now we are enjoying our daughter.  We are enjoying our summer as a family of five.  We are preparing this weekend to celebrate Rogan's 3rd birthday. We are living our everyday lives.

It is my opinion this is the downhill side of adoption.  Technically, she is not officially ours.  She will be officially ours after finalization.  Could she be taken away from us?  I guess she could.  If we did something wrong or if the birth parents were able to prove they were coerced or under duress when they relinquished their parental rights.  Although it could happen, it is highly highly unlikely.

When you see a story on the news about a 5 year old who was taken away from their adoptive family by their birth family it is because the proper steps were not taken.  Court documents were not completed and filed.  The home study was never completed.  The adoption process was never finalized.  These instances are rare and make the headline news because they are dramatic, emotional and eye catching.  They are not the norm.

 Getting bigger everyday!
 Big Brother
Almost 3 years old!


Patiently Waiting...... said...

I love reading about the post-placement side of the adoption journey. Thank you for sharing. You have a beautiful family! Good luck with the post placement visits!

kkasun said...

She is just beautiful!!!

S.I.F. said...

She is so incredibly perfect and I am so happy you are adjusting as a family of five right now!