Our meeting with the birth family was scheduled to occur this morning in about an hour. We were informed last night that they asked our social worker to reschedule for next week. Of course we were a little bummed and to be honest a little annoyed. We had made arrangements for child care and Brian had rearranged his work schedule. It is however a common occurrence. With every adoption we have experienced, failed and successful, we have experienced rescheduling, missed appointments and cancelled phone calls.
At this time we are not reading too much into it. Our social worker said they still sounded committed to the adoption, but so did the family in August. Up and down that is the emotional roller coaster we ride as parents in waiting.
If you read my blog because you are beginning the process of adoption be prepared to be flexible. Scheduling is rarely firm and appointments are never set in stone. We have found this be true in all our experience. I try to always look at it from the point of view of the birth parents. Can you imagine meeting the family you have chosen to parent your child? Preparing for the meeting is nerve wracking for all of us involved. The birth family is sometimes shy, perhaps even embarrassed. They often feel ashamed to be in their situation. Meeting the adoptive parents makes their decision very real. They are forced to meet feelings and emotions head on. I believe it is safe to say, no one sets out to be a birth parent.
As the adoptive parents, all we can do is be patient and understanding while remaining optimistic and realistic about the process.