Key Fobs & Adoption

Erin from Dub Lane Designs is selling handmade key fobs.  The adorable fobs are inexpensive ($10) and so handy. When our hands are full doing other things we have a difficult time digging for our keys.  The key fob allows you to hang the keys from your wrist keeping your hands free.  The greatest part about the key fobs...Erin, her husband Bryce and their handsome young son Kyah are preparing to add to their family via adoption.  The money raised through Dub Lane Designs goes directly to their adoption fund.  I ordered key fobs for Brice's teachers and riding instructor. They make great stocking stuffers and Christmas gifts.  Check them out...click here!

I always love supporting adoption while Christmas shopping!

Happy Holidays!

Each year I attempt to get a photo of the kids for a Christmas card and ornament. One year I even managed to get a photo of all of us together.

It is the grandparents' Christmas wish each year to receive a photo of their grandchildren together.  Now that we are a family of five it is has become increasingly more difficult.  Getting three small children to participate in a Christmas photo session is a monumental task.  Today it went a little something like this...

I was able to get a few photos to actually use on a Christmas card and honestly I like photos like the above best.  I mean really who wants to see our kids posed perfectly with fake smiles on their faces in perfect little outfits.  Perfectly posed, neatly pressed, smiling innocently...that is not our kids.

The above is the real deal.

I cannot wait to send out our photo card this year.

Don't worry if you are not on our Christmas card exchange list I always post the picture on my blog too.  You will not miss out on seeing our little sweet innocent angels.

Oh, I love it.  This picture cracks me it.

Yep, those are our kids.

Just Pictures

Waiting During the Holidays

This is a post I did last year about this time and I felt it was worth reposting. Making patience your virtue during the holidays is easier said than done but is a goal worth setting.  Happy holidays, please enjoy the season.


Waiting to adopt during the holidays can be especially difficult.  It seems during this time of year everything centers around families and children. Everywhere you turn you are reminded, you are waiting to become a parent.

Here are a few tips:

1. Take a trip just the two of you.  If you cannot handle all the baby talk and questions during the holidays get away from it.  If you can afford it take a trip even if it is somewhere close to home.
2.  Take care of each other.  Often it is just as hard for your partner as it is for you during the holidays.  Instead of letting the stress get to you and possibly causing arguments open the lines of communication and talk about it.  You are going through this journey together learn to lean on each other.
3.  Remind others you are waiting to adopt on your holiday a greeting card.  It never hurts to gently remind people you are waiting and if they know of a birth parent looking to place their child they should contact you.
4.  If you get the dreaded, "so when are you going to start your family?" or "any news on the adoption" be kind and simply say, "we are always hopeful and cannot wait to share our news when the time comes". 
5.  Keep a journal.  Write down your feelings, your future child will appreciate reading about your anticipation and desire for their arrival someday.
6.  Scope out your family events before you attend.  If you are going to be surrounded by pregnancy and you do not think you will be able to handle it...skip out if you can.  Perhaps you can explain to those closest to you who will hopefully understand.
7.  Get support, join an adoption support group. 
8.  If you are going shopping over the holidays, avoid the baby section.

Listed below are the sources I used to develop this list and some are from my own experience.  Check out the sources listed below for additional ideas and support. 

http://library.adoption.com/articles/handling-the-holidays-.html
http://library.adoption.com/articles/the-waiting-game.html

National Adoption Day

It's National Adoption Day! http://www.nationaladoptionday.org/

Latest Happenings

Little Missy is 5 months old as of yesterday.  She is getting big although I am not sure exactly how much she weighs because she has not been to the doctor in a month.  She has outgrown all of her 0-3 mos and 3 mos clothing. She is not yet rolling over but will be soon.  I believe we are starting to teeth although I cannot be sure.  She drools nonstop and wants to chew on anything and everything.  She recognizes our faces and definitely her bottle.  She is able to grasp and hold items and bring them to her mouth.  I have not started her on solid foods I generally wait until about 6 months of age.  I might be a little bit biased but I am also certain she continues to get prettier everyday.

Getting older but not any prettier...me!  Today was Anna day and those who know me know I am very obnoxious about my birthday.  I am not fearful of getting older and I say bring on 35!  It's my day and I want you to know it.

I had a pretty great day despite not feeling the best.  Crazy weather in Oklahoma freezing temperatures one day and spring like temperatures the next have wreaked havoc on our sinuses.

We had electricians here most of the day today installing outdoor outlets for Christmastime.  Clark W. Griswold (a.k.a my dear husband Brian) can get a little carried away with his outdoor holiday illumination.  You may remember last year his lighting display used so much electrical energy that I caused a minor blackout by turning on the television and running the vacuum cleaner.  After last year's power surges and blown fuses I made him promise he would have additional outlets installed.  Of course my request was not met with much resistance because it means more power!  Great.  Looking forward to this year's lights.  Hoping no small planes attempt to land in our front yard.  Stay tuned.

Horse Show

Brice began riding lessons in May this year.  He has really taken to riding and asks to go ride "his" horse all the time.  Today, was the first time he was able to participate in a show.  The beginners are taken in by their instructors and led around the arena while a "judge" tells them what to do...trot, walk, two point stance and posting. After reversing the line and completing the tasks in the opposite direction the kids are led to the middle of the arena to line up.  Afterward the "judge" says how wonderful they all did and a single standout cannot be chosen therefore they will all receive blue ribbons.  Briceman is awfully proud of his ribbon.

Adoptive Families 2011 Holiday Gift Guide

Adoptive Families' 2011 Holiday Gift Guide

Adoptive Families' annual gift-giving directory presents a selection of heritage and adoption products from our sponsors.

Go to AdoptiveFamilies.com/holidaygifts to see AF's picks for gifts that give back to organizations benefiting kids worldwide.

Atlanta Area Adoption Workshop

A workshop for Adoptive Parents-To-Be
Featuring Best Selling Author and adoptive mom Julie Gumm

Date: Saturday, November 19th, 2011 10:00AM-12:30pm
Location: Alpharetta, GA (details at link below)

Don't let the cost of adoption stop you from pursuing your dream. Come learn how grants, tax credits, and creative fundraising ideas can help you raise the money you need for private or international adoption. Session will highlight specific examples of families and various fundraising methods.

What others are saying about Julie Gumm and her book:
"I receive calls on my show all the time about how you have to go into debt to adopt. Julie Gumm is living proof and a testament to the fact you can adopt without ANY debt. I highly recommend reading "Adopt Without Debt" if you are considering adoption." ~Dave Ramsey, Best-selling author, national speaker and nationally syndicated talk radio host

To register: Adopt Without Debt Workshop - Adoption- Eventbrite

Waiting Child

I receive the following emails through an adoption list serv.  I do not have personal experience with the agencies or facilitators.  Please practice due diligence and research the postings.

___________________________

I am working with a young woman who is expecting a baby girl due at the end
of January, in Washington State. She and the father are Marshallese, and
have been in the US since 2009. They are raising two children together, and
are very committed to this adoption. The expectant mother is healthy, but is
a carrier of the Hep B virus (as are many from the Marshall Islands). Her
doctor has said she has no complicating factors, and the baby will be given
the appropriate vaccination and any other required treatment at birth.

I have worked with this young woman before, as she previously made and
carried out an adoption plan through my office. Please contact me if you are
paper-ready and SERIOUSLY interested.

Aloha,

Linda E. F. Lach
llach@hawaii.rr.com
Attorney at Law

Adoption Documentary to Air Nov 9th

Dear Friend,

I am pleased to tell you that the documentary Unlocking the Heart of Adoption will air on The Documentary Channel on Wednesday, November 9 at 3pm EST for National Adoption Awareness Month.  To find the channel number in your area go to -http://www.documentarychannel.com/getdoc.php and scroll down to – Select your cable provider.  

Unlocking the Heart of Adoption bridges the gap between birth and adoptive families through diverse personal stories of adoptees, birthparents and adoptive parents in same race and transracial adoptions revealing the enormous complexities in their lives with fascinating historical background.

To view the trailer, see what others have to say about Unlocking the Heart of Adoption and purchase the DVD go to:http://www.unlockingtheheart.com.  And if you are on Facebook, please go tohttps://www.facebook.com/pages/Unlocking-the-Heart-of-Adoption/10150113790230214?v=wall&ref=pdemand Like the page.  Thank you!

Best wishes,

Sheila Ganz
unlockingheart@hotmail.com
http://www.unlockingtheheart.com

PLEASE FORWARD TO OTHERS YOU THINK WILL BE INTERESTED.  THANK YOU.

Adoption Self-Assessment Quiz

Source:  www.adoption.com

The goal of this quiz is to help you (and your spouse) identify, clarify and discuss your feelings and goals about adoption. If you have a spouse or partner, complete the assessment separately, then compare and discuss your answers.

1. Why do you want to adopt?
   
2. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the highest, how badly do you want to adopt?
   
3. Who is the driver of wanting this adoption? Will this cause conflict?
   • Me (definitely)
   • Me (a little bit more than my spouse)
   • My spouse/partner (definitely)
   • My spouse/partner (a little bit more)
   • Both want to adopt about the same
4. Will this driver/driven dynamic cause conflict in your relationship?
   
5. What age child would you prefer to adopt? (Underline the preferred age, and circle all ages you would be willing to consider.)
   • Newborn (under six months)
   • Infant (newborn to 2)
   • Preschooler (3 to 5)
   • Primary school (6 to 10)
   • Middle school (11 to 14)
   • High school (15 to 18)
6. How firm are you on the age selected above? 
   
7. Which of the following disabilities would you be willing to consider in an adoptive child? (Select all that you would consider)
   • Drug exposed (occasional)
   • Deafness
   • Mild or medically correctable condition
   • No drugs or alcohol considered
   • Non-correctable (cerebral palsy, retardation etc.)
   • Alcohol exposed (occasional)
   • Alcohol exposed (frequent)
   • Smoking exposed
   • Emotional/mental disorders in family
   • Emotional/mental disorders in child
   • Premature birth
   • Multiple birth
   • Club foot
   • Cleft pallet or lip
   • Downs Syndrome
   • Epilepsy in child
   • Epilepsy in family
   • Blindness
   • Diabetes in child
   • Diabetes in family
   • Conceived through rape
   • Conceived through incest
   • Nothing known about father
   • Nothing known about mother
   • Sibling group
8. Which of the following racial heritages would you be willing to consider in an adoptive child? (Select all that apply)
   • Any Child
   • Arab/Middle Eastern
   • Asian
   • African American
   • Caucasian
   • Caucasian/Asian
   • Caucasian/African American
   • European
   • Caucasian/Hispanic
   • Caucasian/Native American
   • Eastern European/Slavic/Russian
   • Hispanic or South/Central American
   • Mediterranean
   • Middle Eastern
   • Multi-Racial
   • Native American (American Indian)
   • Pacific Islander
9. Which gender would you prefer in your child?
   • Girl
   • Boy
   • Either
10. Would you consider twins?
    • Yes
    • No
11. Do you feel you are stable in your relationship as a couple without having children? 
    
12. Which friends and family members would you want to tell about your adoption plans? Which would be supportive and which would not? 
    
13. What level of openness are you willing to consider with birthparents?
    • Completely open adoption
    • Open adoption with reasonable boundaries
    • Exchanging letters and photos only
    • Completely confidential adoption
14. Would you be willing to comply with specific birth family requests regarding child rearing (such as religious instruction, name or schooling)?
    • Yes
    • No
15. 15. Where would you be willing to go to adopt? (Select all that apply)
    • Only in our state
    • Neighboring states
    • Anywhere in US
    • International
16. How much time will you take off work during and after the adoption?
    
17. How much money would you be willing to spend on an adoption? 
    
18. How much economic hardship would that cause?
    
19. When and how do you feel children should be told they're adopted?
    • As early as possible / preschool
    • Mid- to late-childhood
    • As adults
    • Only when they ask
    • Only when they find out
    • Never
    • Not sure
20. Would you support/assist your child if he/she wanted to find, contact or have a relationship with his/her birthparents?
    • Yes
    • No
    • Don't know
21. Many adoptive parents have 'dry runs' before they actually adopt. How would you handle an adoption that matched with you but did not end up placing?
22. Will you or your spouse (partner) change your workload outside the home after the adoption?
23. • Yes, I will stay at home with the child
    • Yes, my spouse will stay at home with the child
    • I will reduce my work load to part time
    • My spouse will reduce his/her work load to part time
    • Will remain the same
    • Already stay-at-home
24. What do you feel you could contribute to a child?
    
25. What aspects of childrearing are so important to you that you would find it difficult to compromise (such as discipline, religion, schooling, stay-at-home parenting, etc.)?
    
26. Are you ready to love an adopted child as much as one you gave birth to biologically?
    • Yes
    • No
    • I think so
    • I don't know
27. Would you prefer to continue with infertility treatment before seriously pursuing adoption? If so, why?
    
28. Deep down do you feel like you are being forced to adopt if you want to have children, adoption as a means to build a family is "second best," or that adoption is your "last resort" if you want to be able to have children? 
    (If you answered yes to any of these points, there is a very good chance that you have some significant unresolved issues relating to infertility that you might find beneficial to address and resolve prior to adopting.)
    
29. What is the ideal adoption situation for you?
    
30. Ideally, how many children would you like?
    
31. How long are you willing to wait to adopt?
    • Up to six months
    • Six months to 1 year
    • 1 year to 2 years
    • 2 to 3 years
    • However long it takes

Are They Yours Yours?

Today, I took our youngest two kiddos to the new Sam's Club built near our home.  It was our first visit to the new club so I stopped by the membership desk to get our newly minted membership and begin our downward spiral into buying all things oversized and in bulk.  Note:  If you are looking for an investment opportunity you might look into Sam's Club stock because I'm quite certain now that the Mitchells are on board their stock is going to rise due to the amount spent on diapers, wipes, formula and beef jerky.

While waiting for the young man to enter all of our pertinent information his manager/co-worker started looking over my little family.  She commented about how pretty Avenn is and that Rogan is a cutie.  Well duh.  I agreed and thanked her.

She said, "are they yours yours?"  Confused, I responded that I didn't understand. She said again "ya know yours yours..are they yours?"  My first thought was well who else's would they be, then my second thought was ohhhh she must think I'm babysitting (because I'm such a young mother and all- HA!).

Finally I answered, if you mean are they my biological children; no they are not.  What made you ask me that?  Is it because we have varying complexions?

She didn't miss a beat and didn't think for a half second that her question might be off the mark. She said, I just wondered.  His dad could be dark like him.  She then showed me a picture of her daughter on her phone who looked EXACTLY like her and said, my daughter could never deny she's mine.  I guess that was supposed to mean mine could.  I don't know.

Sensing how inappropriate her questions were her much younger coworker said, it doesn't matter a bit where they come from they ARE yours.  I agreed and said I couldn't love them any differently if I had birthed them myself.

Thankfully, my membership was ready. The dude snapped my picture and we were on our way.  I absolutely never mind answering adoption related questions.  I'll advocate anywhere...even at Sam's, but think before you ask.  I hope this woman realized she needs to rephrase and perhaps be a little less forward.

In other news, my license plate is drawing attention.  I have been asked several times where and how I got my adoption plate.  The most exciting run in I have had involved an elderly man pulling up next to me in the McDonald's drive thru, getting out of his truck, stepping in front of my vehicle scaring the life out of me.  He yelled, "where'd ya get that plate!?"  It took me a second.  After regaining normal cardiac rhythm, I told him and he hopped back in his truck then drove off.

Spreading the word I guess!

Have a great weekend!

Waiting Child

I receive the following emails through an adoption list serv.  I do not have personal experience with the agencies or facilitators.  Please practice due diligence and research the postings.

___________________________

LOOKING FOR a Family / African American Caucasian baby due Early February 2012 --- Breea - Feb
Name & Due Date: Breea – February 2012
Sex (If Known): UNKNOWN
Race: Biracial – Caucasian and African American
Location: Mid-South Region - AR, KS, OK, TX - 
Health: Good health – pot was used until she found out she was Pregnant (About 2 months) – She smoked but quit because of pregnancy. 
Other Info: BM would like a Biracial family or they should have at least one other child that is of Color. She prefers a family that doesn't have a lot of children. 
Total Estimated Fees: $ 11,000
Case Worker: l

IF YOU ARE PAPER READY AND INTERESTED, please contact Sarah sarahjdalia@gmail.com (sarahjdalia @ gmail.com - No spaces) or Adam adambodily@gmail.com (adambodily @ gmail.com - No spaces) 

You will also need to go to our webpage WWW.Adoptionadvertising.org download the adoptive parent intake form, fill it out and email it toadambodily@gmail.com (adambodily @ gmail.com - NO SPACES) and Sarah sarahjdalia@gmail.com (sarahjdalia @ gmail.com - No spaces). Adam will call you after he gets the intake from the web page. 

Kathy Finch kathrynmfinch@hotmail.com
"Adoption Advertising" Adoption Administrative Assistant
WWW.Adoptionadvertising.org

National Adoption Awareness Month

Today begins National Adoption Awareness Month.  If you are looking for ways to observe this special month you can check the National Adoption Month website here.

Today's observation activity is to begin an adoption blog...check!

If you are interested in reading why I started blogging about adoption see my very first post here.

Waiting Child

I receive the following emails through an adoption list serv.  I do not have personal experience with the agencies or facilitators.  Please practice due diligence and research the postings.

___________________________

LOOKING FOR a Family / Caucasian baby due April 2012 --- Code: APRIL T 2012

Name & Due Date: April – April 2012
Sex (If Known): UNKNOWN
Race: Caucasian
Location: Mid-South Region - AR, KS, OK, TX -
Health: Mom is in good health and was told nothing is wrong with pregnancy. 
Other Info: minimal contact with family before; maybe letters and pictures after - BF involved and will sign - has placed with us before - looking for a married couple with none or few kids
Total Estimated Fees: $ 27,000
Case Worker: n

IF YOU ARE PAPER READY AND INTERESTED, please contact Sarah sarahjdalia@gmail.com (sarahjdalia @ gmail.com - No spaces) or Adam adambodily@gmail.com (adambodily @ gmail.com - No spaces) 

You will also need to go to our webpage WWW.Adoptionadvertising.org download the adoptive parent intake form, fill it out and email it toadambodily@gmail.com (adambodily @ gmail.com - NO SPACES) and Sarah sarahjdalia@gmail.com (sarahjdalia @ gmail.com - No spaces). Adam will call you after he gets the intake from the web page. 

Kathy Finch kathrynmfinch@hotmail.com
"Adoption Advertising" Adoption Administrative Assistant
WWW.Adoptionadvertising.org