Did our failed adoption happen for a reason? We all know the old saying. So, what was the reason? Maybe the birth parents needed to go through the process to realize they wanted an open adoption. Perhaps they needed more time to make up their mind. Or maybe they did not like us. I hope not, but could be I guess. I do not know why we rode that roller coaster of emotions but we did and we are better for it.
1/26/10
Our Failed Adoption
In January 2008 we were chosen to become the adoptive parents of a boy due one month later. Read about our failed adoption here. Obviously, the birth parents changed their minds and we did not become the parents of that child. Instead, our son was born five months later in July and Rogan joined our family. Thank goodness, I cannot imagine a day without Rogan's dimples and smile.
Did our failed adoption happen for a reason? We all know the old saying. So, what was the reason? Maybe the birth parents needed to go through the process to realize they wanted an open adoption. Perhaps they needed more time to make up their mind. Or maybe they did not like us. I hope not, but could be I guess. I do not know why we rode that roller coaster of emotions but we did and we are better for it.
We are a stronger couple because we handled a situation as difficult as it was and came through it together. We appreciate Brice's adoption more because he was chosen for us and we were blessed his adoption went so smoothly. We are better because we have Rogan, he was meant to be ours. February was not our time, July was and we know that now.
Did our failed adoption happen for a reason? We all know the old saying. So, what was the reason? Maybe the birth parents needed to go through the process to realize they wanted an open adoption. Perhaps they needed more time to make up their mind. Or maybe they did not like us. I hope not, but could be I guess. I do not know why we rode that roller coaster of emotions but we did and we are better for it.
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4 comments:
Our failed placement happened in November. We have been doing really well, but I have to admit for some reason the last couple of days, has me reliving it for some reason. We are very blessed to have our 4-year-old, and I know our lives will still be blessed forever if we are not parents to two children, but it still hurts. Thank you for sharing.
That must be such a hard thing to go through; to be expecting and awaiting a child only to lose him... I would imagine it would be similar to the loss felt with a miscarriage. I'm sorry, but I'm so glad you got Rogan!
We had a failed adoption attempt, too, before we successfully adopted Mimi. We didn't have any children at the time and felt like we NEVER would. Now, of course, we feel blessed to have Mimi. Reading accounts like yours helped us through the early dark days, though. Thanks!
We never had a failed adoption, just three long years waiting and wondering why THOSE couples got chosen to have a child and not us. And then our Sam came along and we just knew that we were waiting for him. In adoption, miraculously each child seems to just meld right in that family like they were created to be that way.
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